Pinkcast 2.8: Another trick for dealing with jerks
LINKS AND FURTHER READING:
- Bob’s book is The A**hole Survival Guide: How to Deal With People Who Treat You Like Dirt. (Buy it at Amazon, BN.com, IndieBound, or 800CEOREAD.)
- You can find even more weasel-avoidance tips in this article from the Stanford School of Engineering.
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Stunning – fifty years in the business and I find you to be a blessing with rich, actionable insights!
PS My grandchildren love you with your wit and wisdom too!
Loved the video on dealing with ***holes
My serenity around a**holes is acquired by evaluating them as members of my personal A**hole Hall of Shame. I can run through the criteria as they are flaming and then grant them entrance into the Hall.
Hi Dan – thanks for the unprecedented tip from Bob Sutton. I loved his first book and bought an extra copy for a client who is a director and an exceptional specimen for the bug jar – unfortunately he missed the point. I fired him as a client. My bug jar is quite heavy!
Love your podcast!
Perfect! Found myself in a situation earlier today with a client who revealed her true asshole colors. Once I realized she has turned out to be just another asshole, my fury turned to detachment. (She won’t be my client much longer.) In effect, I had put on my lab coat and added her to my jar of asshole specimens. What a great metaphor! I will use that to remind myself if/when I forget next time…. Thank you for a great tip!
Y’all have great chemistry and laughing at assholes is probably the best response of all. I love the bug-jar concept and will retain this for the next asshole I encounter.
Good stuff! Happy Thanksgiving!
Daniel Pink is the ONLY blog I read. I look forward to his newsletter every other Tuesday. Please keep up the excellent work. I have read many of his books and look forward to the next one next year. I think I will go and buy the asshole book too! Thanks again for great quality online!
There are much more effective approaches. No human should be labelled ever. I suggest practicing Non-violent Communication (NVC) by Marshall Rosenberg.
Every person is simply trying to express feelings and needs. Not everyone is fortunate to be able to express these clear. We can help by talking and thinking in a different way — NVC. Sometimes we may not have the time resources to help a person communicate feelings and needs clearer, and we may chose to not engage further, but nobody is a ‘Jerk’ or any other label. All humans simply express feelings and needs — mostly a ‘please’ or a ‘thank you’. Highly recommend you check NVC.
The best part of these is realizing I’m not alone in dealing with difficult people. Sometimes it really is them!
Super funny AND super relevant! Thanks for another Pinkcast tip!
I’ve been looking forward to meeting my Doctor. Please, Doctor, tell me there’s a cure!
I learned some years ago to keep saying to myself, “this is not about me — it’s about them.” That mantra has helped me thru many difficult conversations where I might otherwise have reacted badly. It’s not about me! The doctor metaphor adds a new playfulness to my approach — it’s not about me, it’s about learning from this amazing specimen! Thanks to both of you for adding some lightness to a topic that often weighs people down.